Over the last twenty-five years, I have conducted a couple thousand interviews at our computer company.

Many candidates claim empathy as a strength, declaring they excel at putting themselves in someone else’s shoes.

But from my experience, few truly understand what matters to a business owner.

And, while I’m not the owner of our company, I’ve learned my greatest asset is caring as if I am the owner.

A Promising Referral

Recently, a good friend referred a young college graduate, saying he was a terrific kid from a solid family. My friend had seen the boy grow up alongside his own children; they had all attended the same Christian homeschool co-op. Seeing the potential, I fast-tracked his resume, telling our HR team to contact him right away.

After a video call, the boy came into our office for a final interview, which I joined. He was articulate, professional, and very likable. I could see that he enjoyed computer programming. I cringed when he called himself empathetic, but almost everyone says that nowadays. He had some experience, but, like many young candidates, there was a skills gap before he could produce quality, billable work for our customers.

I told him that he had some things to learn and his success largely depended on him. If he wanted to make it at our company, he would need to work some nights and weekends to close the gap and to get where he needed to be.

He nodded, saying he understood, and we all left the interview feeling good about the next steps.

The Offer

Over the weekend, someone from HR forwarded over the boy’s response to our offer. He had replied with, “Thank you so much for the offer! I’m very grateful that you are willing to invest time into training me up with the necessary skills, and should I work there, I will do my best to make that investment worthwhile!”

But then we started seeing his actions, not his words. He pushed back on our offer amount and asked for $5,000 more. He then requested an early review in August and asked what he should expect for a raise for “excellent performance merit.”

I sighed and told HR I would call him back on Monday.

Reality Check

I told him that we get over 100 resumes EVERY DAY. Our HR team may have picked his resume from that pile — but likely not. But, because of my friend’s referral, we called him right away for an interview.

I said that while we see his potential, it’s not a slam dunk he will make it at our company. I reminded him of my comments during his interview, that he would need to work hard and put in extra time to be successful with us.

I said, “If I were you, and you have a good feeling about our company and feel it is right for you, then I wouldn’t haggle over the money. I would take the opportunity, work my butt off and immerse myself in the role, focusing on doing great work for our customers. Do that, and trust me, the money and everything else will take care of itself.”

I reminded him that I had been at the company for almost 30 years and that we have over a hundred people who have been here for over 10 years, many of whom have worked with us for 15-20+ years. I said that we have talented people who could work almost anywhere, yet they choose to stay with us.

The boy listened and said, “I know, I know, I should not have got this opportunity.” I quickly disagreed, saying, “No, you do deserve it. My friend wouldn’t have called me unless you were a good kid. But now that you have the offer, take it and run with it!”

Fortunately, he accepted our offer the next day. Now, it is mainly up to him and how hard he works. We should know much more in 3-6 months, but I think it will be great for both sides.

A Culture of Ownership